2009 Cleveland Browns Schedule (I know Joey can especially appreciate this)

2009 Browns SCHEDULE
September
13.......... Taft Junior High School
20..........Cub Scout Troop #101
27.......... Cleveland Blind Academy

October
04..........Spanish American War Vets
11..........Crippled Children's Home
18.......... Eloise Mental Hospital
25..........Girl Scout Troop # 353

November
01.......... Ohio Venereal Disease Clinic
08..........Fraser Boys Choir
15..........Korean Amputees
22.......... National Hospital Pastoral Ministers
26.......... Great Lakes Synchronized Swimming Team

SPECIAL MONDAY NIGHT GAME
December
08.................. Lakewood Gay Boys Club

RULE CHANGES FROM LAST YEAR1 - When playing polio patients, the Browns must not disconnect knee braces.
2 - When playing the Blind Academy , the Browns must not hide the football under their jerseys.**

RULES THE SAME FROM LAST YEAR **1 - A touchdown (this is when the ball is carried over the goal line. For all you Browns fans that have never seen this) it is still worth 6 points.
2 - The Browns will be allowed 20 men on the field at all times.
3 - The Browns will be allowed to substitute with band members at anytime.
4 - The Browns will be awarded 10 timeouts as opposed to 3 for the opposing team.
5 - The Browns will be awarded a first down with each gain of three yards or more, instead of the usual ten yards.**

NAME CHANGE **The Cleveland Browns will be changed to the "Cleveland Tampons" as they are only good for one period and have no second string.**
PLAYER CHANGE **Field goal kicker will be replaced by Monica Lewinsky. She will no doubt blow a few, but she certainly won't choke on the big ones!!!